Friday, September 5, 2014

Let's Be Reasonable

 
     "Hey old man, where have you been," Warren said to Marty. "You've been on vacation or something?"
     Marty, still feeling sated by, yes, his vacation, turned slowly to his annoying younger halfling of a brother and thinking before speaking what was really on his mind, said, "Scotland was wonderful. Great people, beautiful county and so civilized. If you put traffic circles on U.S. urban expressways there would be mass shootings, accidents galore and gridlock from confusion.
     "But in Scotland, all the drivers are not eating, talking on their phone or otherwise distracted, so the traffic circles work great. It helps they're all driving stick shifts, so they don't have an extra hand for texting and eating."
     "I'm hungry now," Warren said. "Let's go get some fast food."
     "I wouldn't advise it," Marty said. "Both on health grounds and because the workers could be out walking the picket line to demand better pay."
     (From The Copy Desk: Last week American fast food workers staged another protest/picket to demand $15 per hour, a living wage, and once again this was dismissed by the giant corporations as "not reasonable." For more information see: strikefastfood.org)
     "The corporations all say they can't afford to raise the pay of their workers," Marty said, "but the CEO of McDonald's makes about $9,200 per hour. That's almost 600 times the salary of a typical burger slinger.
     "And then there's Burger King. It's buying Tim Horton's and 'relocating' to Canada. This is a tax dodge, to get the lower Canadian corporate tax. Very patriotic of them."
     "That's insane," Warren said. "I'll never eat one of their salads again. Would this move really save them money?"
     "Actually, it may be debatable," Marty said. "The statutory U.S. corporate tax rate is 35 percent, but with all the loopholes and tax dodges the effective corporate rate is about 12.5 percent. So these tax-driven moves to overseas may not be the windfall these very profitable companies hope for."
     Warren, once again appearing a bit dazed, said, "It's clear to me now. The corporate greed syndrome makes the rich richer, and the rest of us suffer. As long as we patronize them that's oppressing us, we will be complicit and suffer for it."
     "Amen," Marty said.