The Hard Way

     "Lazy old sun, what have you done to summertime," Marty grumbled, after the third day in a row of dark clouds and rain.
     "I'm too terrified to walk out of my own front door," Warren said, after yet another clap of thunder rattled the dishes in the summer burrow.

Warren watches Eric Cantor quit the House leadership.

So, while they were holed up in the burrow, The Boys turned on the cable news and saw that a highly conservative member of the terribly conservative wing of the Republic Party, who, after losing his party primary for not being conservative enough, was in the process of resigning his post in the party leadership in the U.S. House of Representatives.
     "Something better beginning," Marty quipped. "How I love to hear the demolition sound."
      Warren cocked his head and asked, "You really got me. I'm not dumb but I can't understand."
     Marty paused, realizing his half-brother could not see that this political infighting could be the first crack in the Republic Party's hopes to make serious gains in the fall elections. "Conservatives live in a world gone by," Marty said, adding vehemently, "No more looking back. No more living in the past."
     "This time tomorrow what will we know," Warren asked.
      Of course this is too soon to know much of anything new, but Marty felt that the future was worth pondering with regard to today's situation with the rival political parties ... but "hatred is the only thing that lasts forever," he said sadly.
     Warren, now gazing at the television with glazed eyes, said, "Look at all the loonies and sad eyed failures."
     Marty glanced over, seeing the Faux Nooze clones lounging on their couches was they spouted their distortions, and stated, "You look like a real human being but you don't have a mind of your own . . . you're brainwashed."

     From The Copy Desk: The ardent Kinks' fans out there saw it, but for the rest of you "dull and simple lad(s)," all The Boys' statements above are lines lifted from Kinks songs . . . their way of honoring Raymond Douglas Davies on the occasion of his 70th birthday yesterday, June 21. God Bless The Kinks.

Gooooooals Are Important

Marty and Warren watching a World Cup Finals football
match between Iran and Nigeria.

     "This is like the 13th match we've watched since last Thursday," Warren said.
     "This IS the 13th match we've watched," Marty said, disgusted with Warren's use of the dreaded "like" word.
     "This is easily the worst match so far," Warren said. "That Germany game and the Netherlands destruction of Spain, wow, and then Costa Rica knocks off Uruguay. Amazing."
     "It's Iran v. Nigeria. One team is athletic, but disorganized, and the other just wants to defend and pray for a counter-attack goal," Marty said. "As they did on June 21, 1998, when they dealt "Death to America" with a 2-1 victory over the USA in Lyon, France. It knocked us out of the tournament."
     Warren asked, "Is that another one of those things you just remember?"
     "No, I needed Marmopedia to get the date exactly right. After the USA game today, I'm going back to rooting for our boys from the Ivory Coast," Marty said. "On Thursday "The Elephants" are back in action against Colombia."
    "The Elephants? What you talkin' 'bout Marty," Warren said. "They don't let elephants play football in the World Cup."

     "No, that's just the nickname of the Ivory Coast team, or Cote' d'Ivoire if you want to get all French about it."
     "Hey it's almost game time. Grab the dinner and the beverages and lets go. USA! USA!," Marty said.
     "I got it, Ghana's gonna go down," Warren cried.
      From The Copy Desk: Yes The Boys' second-favorite football team is the Ivory Coast. Just because they like elephants, and wish just some of the Predator drones on the planet would be deployed to defend the herds from poachers. See their earlier post "Drone Alone."
    
    

Survey Results

Marty, as required by federal law, fills out his American Community Survey.

     From The Copy Desk: Marty was exhausted after filling out the American Community Survey for the U.S. Census Bureau. So he took a nap, but unfortunately where he laid down later was in direct sunlight - nearly frying his brain. Warren's quick action to put a cold compress on Marty's head saved the day and the sudden cold gave Marty a clear insight and vision for this November. What follows is a rough transcript of his predictions.


     M: Whoa. My head hurts. Why do I have a cold towel on my head?
     W: You fell asleep in the sun and nearly fried your brain. The cold towel should bring you back to reality. You've been babbling. You said something about the Cent Nate and the Demo Crates.
     M: That would be the Senate and the Democrats. You should get your hearing checked.
     W: OK. The Senate and the Democrats. What about them?

Marty out on a limb to predict the 2014 election.

     M: It occurs to me that the prevailing pundit predictions are wrong. There's more going on than they'll admit to and even more that they willfully ignore.
     W: Do tell.
     M:Well, right off the bat, I say the Democrats hold on to the U.S. Senate. The extreme Republic Party rhetoric will alienate enough voters to make it possible for the Democrats to hang on. Also, the economy will finally start to grow and that will also help immensely. Other factors could also help - economic growth in Europe, a realization that the rabid, blanket opposition to anything the current administration does is actually damaging the nation, a backlash against the sea of secret money that, if reports are true, has already purchased all the relevant television time in all important markets and, this is my favorite part, a superior 'ground game' by the Democrats to get out their voters.
     W: I think your head is still too hot.
     M: Nope. I can see clearly now the pain is gone.