Nyet Neutrality

     From The Copy Desk: Marty and Warren are concerned about the recent Federal Communications Commission proposal to "preserve" net neutrality . . . the concept that has made the Internet work as well as it has so far and also made it the dangerous, ad-infested, banal and gross place that it is - all data is equal.



     "Hey Marty look at this webpage," Warren shouted. "There's videos of humans doing really stupid things. They're so cute when they fall down."

Warren checks out stupid human videos.

     Marty looked up from the U.S. Census Bureau's "American Community Survey" packet he'd recently received in the mail. "Don't bother me," Marty grumbled. "I have to fill out this stupid form for the federal government."
     "Why? Can't they fill out their own forms, they must be pretty stupid. Maybe there's videos of federal bureaucrats doing stupid things," Warren said. (There are, of course, videos of federal bureaucrats doing stupid things. And yes, they should all be collected at one website for the public's entertainment - we should get more for our money. I'm talking to you GSA. - The Copy Desk)
     "No silly. They want to know stuff about us and our house," Marty said.
     "Isn't that what the NSA is for," Warren quipped.
      "Well mostly," Marty said. "Maybe they're testing our honesty. If my answers don't agree with their data - fire up the black helicopters."
     "So why did your survey come in the mail," Warren asked. "Can't you do it online?"
     "I could have but I didn't want to log into any more federal websites than I have to. It's best to keep a low profile with those guys," Marty said. "Also, if the Chinese hackers are into the Census Bureau's systems, they'll  be able to get at me."
     "Sounds scary, who's supposed to protect us from online threats and keep this thing working good," Warren asked.
     "That's the job of the Federal Communications Commission," Marty said. "And some other bureaucrats and spies, but the FCC makes the basic rules, when they get around to it.
     "Did you see the story about the FCC proposing new rules designed to preserve net neutrality," Marty said. "It's pretty funny. They decided that it is, indeed, wrong to let Internet Service Providers slow down some data for the benefit of data from sources that pay them more, but then said it's OK to let ISPs speed up some data from sources that pay them more."
    "That makes no sense, how do I tell them it's a stupid idea," Warren said.
    "I think there's a federal website you can go to, but I haven't looked it up," Marty said. (To comment of the FCC's proposed net neutrality rule visit  FCC.gov/comments and go to Proceeding No. 14-28, also known as "Protecting and Promoting the Open Internet." - The Copy Desk)
     "If they let the money control the flow of data packets on the Internet," Marty warned, "It will be the end of the largest freely open collaboration, communication and creation system ever devised."
    Warren whispered in Marty's ear, he seemed to think for a bit, whispered back into Warren's ear and then they scurried off to the lab.

Warren and Marty with a series of tubes, intent on building their own Internet.

Happy "Brothers Day"

     From The Copy Desk: It is worth remembering that groundhogs, Latin name marmota monax, are a bit hard of hearing. Who am I to stop them if they're having fun.


    

Marty and Warren celebrating "Brothers Day" with some regional beverages.
 From The Copy Desk: You can see why green and purple are the boys' favorite colors.

Either Oar

   Heaven sometimes speaks through the mouths of false prophets for the confusion of the wicked.
                                                                                   - Father Fray Antonio Agapida

                                                     Washington Irving, Chronicle of the Fall of Grenada


      Warren, still recovering from his recent enlightenment, faced the daunting task of rebuilding his worldview.Thankfully he's not German, or he'd have to learn to spell that really long German word for worldview. 
      So the younger half-brother turned once again to Marty, posing this question, "So how is it that things are so messed up at this time."
     "That's a long story," Marty said. "But I'll give you the 'Cliff Notes' version. I blame Congress."
     "What does a precipice have to do with any of this," Warren said. "There's no cliffs around here for 20 miles."
     Marty sighed, wondering how to explain the situation to his simple halfling brother. "Sorry, let me start over with a metaphor.
     "If we were in a rowboat, sharing the work, we would need to row together or we'd just go around in circles. That's what's happening now . . . one side of the boat, on the ship of state if you will, isn't rowing."
     "Who's not rowing," Warren asked. "Is it the Republic Party?"
     "You've been paying attention, good gopher," Marty said.
     "Here's the details, in list form," Marty said.
     * Obama is a weak leader - so say the same people who howled in opposition when he threatened to bomb Syria.
     * The stimulus package was a failure - so say those who fail to mention 1/3 for the money went to their favorite things, tax cuts, which did little to help the economy and left too little money for things like infrastructure that actually put people to work.
     * The IRS targets conservative groups - actually it also targeted all the groups with "Occupy" in the name.
     * Obama is a dictator - (see Obama is a weak leader above, then ponder the paradox) the president uses the tools of the executive branch to help make things better because Congress won't do anything.

Marty and Warren watch The Daily Show.

     * Benghazi is a terrible scandal and coverup - so say the people who voted to reduce the funding of the State Department's security program. And besides, investigations about TV talk show "talking points' is really just politicians accusing politicians of being politicians.
     * The Affordable Care Act is a terrible idea - which came from the Heritage Foundation, a market-based solution to covering the uninsured.
     *  The President's policies have impeded economic progress - so say those who threatened to default on the nation's debt.
      * "Voter Fraud" justifies onerous requirements for voting and restrictions or elimination of expanded voting -  besides there being no real proof of almost ANY individual voter fraud, how dare they stand there and deny Americans votes when they suppress votes in areas unlikely to support them by reducing polling places and the capacity of the remaining polling places (Ohio, in particular).
     * Obama's actions somehow "disrespect" the office of the president - so say those who denigrate and insult the man who was elected president twice (one more than George W. Bush, who after all was appointed the first time by the Supreme Court).
     * The "Left" is at war with religion - well maybe with fundamentalist fanatics who refuse to let others believe what they want (freedom) and insist on imposing their views on everyone else (in a nation founded on religious freedom, the Founding Fathers said you can't legislate a man's beliefs . . . also see Jefferson's Virginia Statute of Religious Freedom).

     "Wow, that's 10 things," Warren said, "Is there more?"
     Marty looked over at the glazed-eyed half-brother and rolled his eyes. "Indeed, but we'll get to that another day."